Saturday, December 31, 2011

LET GO!

I am a list person, are you?  I like to make a list of what I have to do that day, and cross off each item as it is completed.  I make lists of what to do, what to pack, what to read, what to blog, what to sew, groceries to buy, or phone calls to make......each little area of my life deserves it's own list.  How about you?  Do you need to make a list in order to feel you have accomplished something?

I am not a resolution person.  I don't really make resolutions, but instead, I set goals, or I make lists.  The last days of the year bring me to examining the past 12 months, and wondering if I completed most of the items on the list.   Last year's list was pretty simple:  Family, Friends, Faith.  How did I do?  I think I accomplished part of the list, but I still fell short in other areas.  I wanted to either remain close, or get closer to family members.  I think I scored a B on that portion of the year's goal.  I really tried to stay more in touch with kids, siblings, and extended family.  A portion of my attempts seemed to hit walls at times, and that isn't my fault.  But I think overall, I remained as close, or got closer to most of those who are important to me.  I have to credit cell phones with most of this success.  Some of my kids seem to prefer to communicate by text, as opposed to talk phone.  And if this is the way they want it, this is the way I will go.  Fortunately, I am tech savoy for the most part.  Other of my kids prefer a daily phone call.   And I love this!  Probably my favorite communication way.  Some text many times during the day.  Others are an email a couple of times a week.  Whatever.  I am up to each of these ways of communication, and I treasure each contact with my kids.

Same with siblings.  With some there is a daily email, some a less often email, some a phone call, and with some a shared church service, or Bible study.  Each is important to me.  Each is a connection to a shared past.  Each one a treasure.  I think I have either maintained, or maybe increased communication in 2011.  But it can always be improved upon!

Some friends I see quite often.  Some friends I text with almost daily.  Some friends are an occasional email, and others just a Christmas letter. But we are connected.  And this year, with my fiftieth class reunion taking place in September, I have reconnected with numerous friends from my past, and have loved each and every contact.  So I think I have succeeded in this area, also.  Probably also a B.

In my faith.  I have learned that the more I learn, the more I need to learn!  I have attended my Tuesday Bible study faithfully, in addition to the Sunday services and Sunday bible study, and I have gained so much from each.  But now I know how much more I need to learn.  The completely overwhelming theme that has run through my faith walk this year is this:  Amazing Grace.  I have never appreciated Grace as much as I have this year, and I am continuing to learn how totally amazing His Grace is!  But that said, I also know how much I still have to learn.  I will grade myself with a B-, and will continue to grow in His Grace this year.

And now on to 2012.  Have you made resolutions?  Have you set a goal?  Or maybe, like me, you have made a list.  I think I have come to the conclusion that in order to further succeed with the 2011 goals, which I will still work on, I need to set the 2012 goal as Let Go.  So, that is my theme for the year, Let Go.

I need to let go of anger as my number one item on the list.  There are things from my past that I am angry about.  I have not offered forgiveness for offenses, but have hung unto the anger portion of the hurt.  Enough of that.  Anger does nothing but make me ache.  Fibromyalgia (FMS) is connected with stress.....my stress from anger is probably the main cause of my pain, and I am tired of hurting.  I am going to work on letting go of this anger, and offering forgiveness, even if none is asked for.  Let go.

I also need to let go of the ideas and plans I had made for my life, and accept what it is, instead.  I have a good life, even though it isn't exactly what I had imagined 40 or 50 years ago.  The ideas I had that have not come to fruition, are not that important anymore.  Let go.  Live in the present, where God has placed me.

Some things I need to let go of probably never even happened.  They are imagined hurts, things I put on myself that were never the intention of the party I have classified all these years as the guilty one.  Let go.

Stuff.  I am going to make more of an effort to let my stuff go.  We've done a lot of trimming down as we retired and traveled in a trailer for a year and a half, but after coming home and settling down again in 2008, we have acquired a lot of stuff.  We bought a small home this past summer, and acquired more stuff to fill it.  Now I would like to trim that stuff a bit again.  Who needs stuff?  What good does it do you? Let go.

Yes, as in every year, I can put losing weight on my list.  However, I have done well in the health department this past year as I went gluten free which reduced my FMS pain considerably.  I guess I was a year ahead of myself in that I Let Go of a lot of pain by letting go of gluten.  I will most certainly continue that area.  I feel so much better.  And I have lost a little weight, but I can certainly Let Go of plenty more.

But the weirdest thing on my Let Go list is this:  I am going to greatly reduce my use of plastic bags!  I have a love affair with plastic zip bags and use them for everything.  And I am germaphobic enough that I seldom reuse them.  What a waste.  I am filling a landfill all by myself with my plastic zip bags.  Years ago I switched to glass containers to keep my leftovers and little bits of things in, and this year I have developed another love affair, this one with Mason jars, so I am doing pretty well in the storage department.  But I always reach for a plastic bag for storage of produce, etc.  I am going to get some of those reusable fabric net type bags I saw at the co-op, and am determined to use those and stop the plastic bag addiction. Let Go!

Now you know that I am a person of excesses.  Too much hurt, too much pain, too much stuff, too much weight........and too much plastic!  I am going to Let Go!

Do you have a list?  What is your plan, goal, or list for 2012?

3 comments:

MHZ said...

Happy New Year to you and family..

cigarisanowl said...

God bless you and your family.
Happy new year!

Paxie said...

I can't believe how similar we are in the "let go" area! I totally related and understood everything you mentioned.

Especially the ANGER. It's hard. I'm also in the process of getting rid of yet even MORE stuff.

I collected mason jars years ago and they are actually in the room with all the STUFF taken down from the attic for me to go through. I'm also a zipper bag woman hahahaha.

Oh my...this was a good post for me. Motivational!!